We received news in September 2020 that we had a potential match! It also happened to be "National Daughter's Day" which is a social media holiday which has caused me so much pain the past few years. However, this year it was a sign from my little girl. I was beyond excited, but couldn't believe how emotional I was. Seeing Lauren's profile and the pictures of her beautiful family made it feel so real. Someone else will be carrying my baby... and this person is incredible and generous enough to want to do so.
As we've gotten to know Lauren, we also know that it was not a coincidence that we were paired together. She is exactly the type of loving, easy going, joyful spirited woman that we would want to bring our next baby into this world. She is also tough as nails and has an unbelievable story of her own, which we didn't know details of until after Lauren became pregnant. Our stories are too connected to be a coincidence...
I've included the letter that Lauren submitted to the surrogacy agency:
(PS- Lauren is on board with me sharing this info).
We call our baby boy “Little Loaf” or "Loafy", and Lauren nicknamed him “Doodle” for Yankee Doodle. (So good!) When Lauren was about 8 weeks pregnant with Loaf Doodle (I doubt he’ll love that nickname), she told us something that still gives us the chills. Her story brought this whole journey with her full circle, even though it was just beginning.
Lauren had a seemingly perfect pregnancy with her first daughter, who is now a beautiful and strong 8 year old. When Lauren delivered Emma naturally, Emma came out blue and silent; the doctors immediately pumped her with oxygen but her abdomen expanded rather than her diaphragm. They rushed her away leaving Lauren and her husband panicked by themselves for hours without answers. A doctor eventually came in with a stack of papers and told Lauren she had 5 minutes to decide which of two hospitals her daughter was to be airlifted to. Emma had a rare diaphragmatic hernia and during delivery, her organs shifted through the hole. Her heart was under her right armpit, she had one viable lung and most organs were not at all where they should be. The doctor told Lauren that Emma would not survive the night but they couldn’t provide the care she needed during her last hours in their NICU. Lauren, only 21 years old at the time, chose Levine Children’s in Charlotte as it was the children’s hospital she’s heard of. They airlifted her baby girl but told Lauren she needed to stay and recover under their watch.
Lauren knew legally they couldn’t keep her so she ripped out her IV’s and had her husband drive her to Charlotte. When she showed up two hours later unexpected, she told the doctors she wouldn’t let her daughter die alone. As Lauren shared this story and the upcoming details with us, it brought back so many painful and horrific memories of our own. The diagnosis between Emma and Kiera was very different (although both rare “flukes”) but the experience was so parallel.
The surgeons told Lauren that they could perform an 8 hour surgery which was no guarantee for success. They usually do PRT, platelet rich plasma, during the surgery but Lauren needed to be made aware of the pros- higher chance of survival, and the cons- most likely brain damage and the inability to walk or talk. Lauren refused to knowingly jeopardize her daughter’s quality of life just to minimize her own fears of losing her. She chose not do the PRT.
The surgery had a successful outcome in which they got Emma’s organs back into place but they were not out of the woods. It would take time to determine if everything functioned properly. They predicted Emma to be in the NICU for several months. She was out in two weeks. A true miracle baby.
Emma is a healthy, active and athletic little girl who only recently found out she has one lung. When Lauren took a picture and showed Emma the scars on her back from the surgery, which she has never seen before, Emma was bursting with pride at what a champ she is.
Unfortunately, Lauren witnessed a lot of parents lose their babies during those couple of weeks in the NICU. She felt guilty that she was one of the “lucky” ones. She had made a promise to God that if Emma made it through this, she would give back and help another family. Here we are, 8 years later. Lauren was presented two other couples from the surrogacy agency which just didn’t feel right. She was then given our profile and our stories were so similar yet the opposite outcome. Lauren knew in her heart that we were the couple she was meant to help. Lauren once sent me a text saying “My experience with Emma is one of the biggest reasons y’all’s story stuck with me and I felt like I was matched with y’all by more than chance. I can’t wait to help y’all’s heart heal, because Lord knows where I’d be if my Emma wasn’t my Emma. I admire your strength, I couldn’t pull myself from a loss and face the world with a smile. It’s admirable in every way. Y’all always call me a saint and superwoman but you have more strength than I do.”
And that’s when this all made sense. We've been gifted one of the strongest, bravest and most generous woman we know, and none of this was a coincidence
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